Well I've started reading a new book called The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers to help out with some of our bedtime/naptime battles. I read the book for babies, but nothing at the time seemed to work or apply. I think now that maybe Princess was just a bit old to start using that book. So far I find the toddler version very helpful and interesting. Elizabeth Pantley explains the sleep cycle and the importance of both naptime and bedtime. She also offers a table with suggested hours of sleep for each based on your child's age (that's most children, not all apply).
As I've read more, she gives a list of sleep cues that your toddler may exhibit and also signs that you're child is overtired. Some of these are very obvious...crankiness, rubbing eyes, etc. There were some that I found a bit surprising...hyperactivity, having trouble falling asleep, and complaining of stomachaches, for example. As I read it, I'm thinking these should really be obvious, but to a mom that has been having trouble getting her child to sleep for 2.5 years, I should be forgiven for not thinking of it. There are obviously plenty of moms who go through the same thing or they wouldn't have books about sleep by the dozens! And our children's sleep habits are continually changing so it's always nice to get a few tips!
So now after a week of trying some of the tips out, Princess has been doing a bit better. The book suggested that if your child doesn't fall asleep in 15-20 minutes at naptime, you get up, let them do a quiet activity for a little while and then try again (unless it's getting too late for a nap). The first day I tried this and after 20 minutes we gave up naptime (unfortunately I had errands to take care of and they took longer than expected, so naptime was started much later than I would've liked). We then started our bedtime routine at 7, skipping bathtime so that she could go to bed a little earlier and she was asleep in 5-10 minutes. Nice!
Day 2 Princess fell asleep for her nap in 10 minutes. By calling it "quiet time" instead of naptime, I've eliminated some of the fussing (I'd usually have to carry her up the stairs kicking and screaming) and she almost happily complies. She isn't falling asleep on her own, but I'm happy to be there to cuddle her for 10 minutes, or even 20, just so long as it's not an hour. We started our bedtime routine that night at 7pm in hopes that she'd be asleep by 8pm. It took a little longer than I'd hoped, but she did fall asleep quicker than normal. We usually leave the bathroom light on with our door open because she complains about being in the dark. Tonight I noticed that the light seemed to be bothering her a bit and partially closed the door (all this after 40 minutes of cuddles)...she was asleep in 2 minutes! That should've been a no-brainer.
Since the first two somewhat successful days, Princess has been doing better, but we're not quite there yet. I have been waking her up consistently at 7am every morning and this has helped with getting her down for an earlier nap and bedtime. Some nights I've had to sit with her for an hour, but I still get to leave the room before 8:30pm which is so much better than sometime between 9 and 10. We do occassionally skip her nap if it's taking too long to get her to sleep, but this usually results in meltdowns around dinner time. I plan to keep trying and hopefully as our routine gets more consistent, she'll fall asleep more easily.