Finding Mommy

Offline for a bit

We have been super busy preparing for the holidays. I've been trying to make quite a few homemade gifts this year. I'll have to post about those later. As for now, it will be even longer between posts since my laptop officially died. My wonderful hubby was able to recover all of my files, but I have no computer to use. Hopefully we'll sort out a solution soon!

thank you sam's club

For the pretty decent smoked sausage, yummy sauce and the fascinating 10 minutes I was able to spend with my 3-year old while she quickly ate and was off again!  During this 10 minutes I was dazzled by her amazing stories of love and marriage.

Me:  So Princess what happened at school today that was fun?

Princess:  Alex (a boy who she is not too keen on and she often tells me that he says she's not his friend) came up to me today and said "will you marry me?" and I said "No, I won't.  I'm going to marry Ky."  Ky was in the woods playing.  And I went in the woods to find him.  (Note: I'm searching my mind to figure out where there are woods at school because I believe she's still answering my question).  But I couldn't and along came my Fairy Godmother.  And she said she would help me find my prince.  So she looked and looked and looked.  And then she found Ky and we lived happily every after.

Me:  That's a great story.  I think I'm going to write that down.  (I got up and grabbed a pen and paper).  So Ky was in the woods playing...

Princess:  And Izzy and Olivia came along.

Me:  Okay, why don't we write that first one down and then the new one.

Princess:  Okay.

So I finished writing down the first story.

Princess:  Once upon a time, I went to find Ky.  And then Izzy and Olivia comed.  And then Princess comed.  All of us were searching and we couldn't.  Then 3 Fairy Godmothers comed and said "Can we help you?"  And we said "Yes!"  And they said "You can go by yourself and we can come later."  And then I found Ky.  And he walked and walked into the woods to his home.  And I went there too.  And Ky found his mom.  And I found my mom and sister and dog and daddy.  And we lived happily ever after.

There was a bit of argument on the end of that story because she kept changing it as I was writing.  She was also talking over me as I repeated it, but that's the ultimate ending of the story (they all ended with Ky and Princess happily ever after, it was just whether or not to add in the family).  Can you see a theme here?  Princess has moved on from her Evan-crush to her Kyler-crush.  I'm hoping this changes by the time she's a teenager.  I'm not sure I can handle a boy-crazy teen!!

soda update

Well my attempt at getting soda out of my life failed after two days.  Or should I say instead, I went two days without soda!  Next time I'll do better.  The glass is half full, right?  Also, on the positive side, I did not pack up my children and leave the comfort of our house for the sole purpose of getting a soda.  But I did take advantage if we were out of the house already.  Oh well. 

Monday I will be visiting a local gym and am seriously thinking about joining this time.  I'm feeling a bit of mommy guilt at the prospect of putting my children in child care so that I can go to the gym, but it's getting to the point where I can't do ANYTHING!  If I try to workout at home, the children climb all over me (and I have to worry about bumping into the littlest one).  Princess does not enjoy being confined to a stroller while I walk around the mall, neighborhood, etc.  And I suppose Mouse doesn't really like it either.  It's not much of a workout when you have a 3-year old walking beside you and a 1-year old screaming her head off because you're not walking fast enough for her to fall asleep.

This week Mouse has barely been napping making it even more difficult for me to get stuff done around here.  I can get her down for maybe a half hour nap and that's usually by driving around in the car or holding/nursing her.  If I try to put her in her crib she immediately hops up and starts screaming.  And I'm definitely not going to let her cry it out.  Why?  For starters I would NEVER have considered letting Princess cry it out.  And did I mention that Mouse has a very sensitive gag reflex?  She's been feeling a bit under the weather with either a cold or teething and every little thing upsets her.  I've been doing my best not to upset her too much (which, quite frankly, I'll probably regret later) by letting her do just about anything she wants.  I was very unsuccessful in my attempts on Thursday and Mouse worked herself into such a frenzy (in a matter of minutes) that she threw up on me 3 times!  I mean, like 3 separate times...she threw up her breakfast, lunch and then bedtime milk ALL OVER ME!  Some days it's really fantastic being a mom.  I feel like I still smell!

So that's pretty much been my week.  Hopefully we'll all feel better next week and I'll make it a bit longer without soda!

last soda, I promise!

Today, as I drove through the McDonald's drive-thru to get another "last Coke," I thought about my aunt.  She has always been a smoker and as long as I can remember, I've given her a hard time about this.  We all know that smoking is bad for us and I never really understood why it was so difficult for her to quit.  Aside from being unhealthy for yourself and everyone around you, I've always disliked the smell of smoke.  I'm very sensitive to odors (I dont' even wear perfume because it gives me a headache and all of my lotions are fragrance free), so the smoking always drove me crazy!  And I always made sure she knew it.  Her response to my prodding was usually something like this "It will be my New Year's Resolution...I'm going through a really hard time now, but in a couple of months I'll try again..."  I thought that if she kept putting it off it would only be harder and that the excuses weren't helping her any. 

Now I find myself in the same position, except that I drink soda (and Coke to be specific).  While it doesn't directly affect those around me, it is not a healthy habit.  And I'm definitely not setting a good example for my kids with the constant "I NEED my morning Coke."  I decided to quit drinking soda sometime around last Thanksgiving.  I did really well for about 2 months.  Then I got a cold and wanted some icey goodness to make me feel better (I know, excuses, excuses).  I've relapsed and now my habit seems to be even worse.  Before, I was satisifed with my morning soda, but now I want more.  I'm craving sodas all day long! 

This may seem a trivial thing to some, but I hate this feeling that I absolutely HAVE to have something.  You know that feeling...like I'd-be-willing-to-pack-up-two-kids-in-the-freezing-cold-during-a-snow-storm-to-get-my-morning-soda kind of thing (yeah, we live in Wisconsin).  It's not a healthy feeling and I'm tired of telling my 3-year old that "this will be my last Coke because it's not good for me."  Or "no you can't have any because it's not good for you."  So I'm admitting that I have a soda addiction and this will be the last soda...for real!  Please hold me accountable. 

a special place in my heart

I received a forward tonight that I've probably seen a million times (and has probably been passed around a billion more), but tonight it struck a cord with me.  I rarely send forwards to others, so if you ever send one to me and don't get it back, please don't be offended.  The forward I received described a teacher who did an experiment with her kids.  She first told each one how they had made a difference in her life and gave them a ribbon that read "Who I Am Makes A Difference."  She then gave each student 3 more ribbons and asked them to perform the same ceremony with someone who's made a difference in their lives.  And it goes on to show how a boy's life was saved when he was given the ribbon.  I'm not sure if this is a true story, but I realized that I do not tell people in my life enough how much I appreciate them and what a difference they've made in my life.  So rather than send out another forward, I thought I'd address the email in my blog.

My husband once asked me why I've added friends on facebook that I haven't seen in years.  "Why are you talking to these 20-something kids that you coached over 10 years ago?"  To him it may not seem important or weird, but those "kids" were a huge part of my life while I was growing up.  And yes, I mean growing up.  I started teaching preschool gymnastics at age 15 and at age 17 I became, rather suddenly, the head coach of our Y's gymnastics team.  Prior to coaching, I had competed with a majority of the girls.  They were a part of my family.  I spent 3 nights a week and every other weekend with them (some for more than 6 years of competition).  I continued to coach my first year of college and then lost track of the girls.  I felt it was easier to cut ties because some of the younger girls would get upset when I'd pop in to visit.  When I wasn't at the gym coaching (or at school or doing school work), I was planning what each individual girl would be working on at each practice, what the best order to have the girls compete in would be, etc.  I spent hours upon hours worrying about those girls every week for several years.  While I might have lost contact with the girls, they've always held a special place in my heart and I was very happy to catch up with a few of them and see that all were doing well (and so grown up now!).

Now that I'm a parent, I realize all of the sacrifices my parents made while I was growing up.  I mean, I had a sense of it during my teenage years (I was rather mature back then), but you can never fully appreciate it until you're a parent.  I sometimes try to convince myself that they couldn't possibly have loved me as much as I love my kids.  How heartbreaking to have my daughter get married and move away!  I hope by the time that happens, it will be easier than the thought of it now.  If I mention to Princess that one day she'll get married and move out, she tells me in a very sad voice with tears in her eyes "Mommy, I don't ever want to leave your house."  And I respond, "Baby, you can live with us forever."  And for now we're both happier to live life thinking this way.  But one day I know I will get to experience exactly how my parents felt when I moved out.

Speaking of getting married and moving out, I certainly can't leave my husband out of this, now can I?  We've been married for nearly 9 years.  I can hardly believe it!  It seems like just yesterday we were sitting in his room at UD watching wrestling and hanging out with our friend Tony.  Hubby's been there to support me over the last 12 years.  He was the one whispering "calm down, it'll be fine" as I cried through our linear algebra final.  He was there to hand me Advil and Pepto and hold my hair back as I threw up during my many migraines (I would like to say I'd do the same for him, but we both know I can't handle puking).  He was there to support and encourage me through the birth of both of our daughters.  He was the one who finally said "enough is enough" when I came home from work crying again because I missed Princess all day.  It's because of his love and support that I could ignore all the comments and looks I got when I was still nursing Princess after her second birthday.  And while he didn't always agree with me not letting the girls cry it out when they wouldn't sleep through the night (and Mouse still doesn't), he was supportive of my choice.

So to my husband and daughters, parents, brother, and sister, and extended family and friends, I want you all to know that you each have had an impact on my life.  You have each contributed something to the person I've become.  I look at my two little girls and think "I must be a pretty good mom" because they are both incredible, loving, happy little girls.  And so I thank each and every one of you for the influence you've had on my life and want you to know that you each hold a special place in my heart.

old habits die hard

One of my goals for the new year, new me was to start eating healthier and work out.  I had been doing pretty well, in fact I've lost about 4-5 lbs.  I've tried making a few of the "Cook Yourself Thin" meals and it's helped me to really focus on what I've been eating.  I also thought I had kicked my daily-can-of-Coke habit.

Then Princess came down with a horrible cold.  Her fever is FINALLY gone (after a week) and she's feeling a bit better, but still has a dreadful cough.  I came down with the same cold starting on Wednesday.  I still feel absolutely horrible!  When I took Princess to the doctor last week I was told it was just a virus and her strep tests came back negative.  So basically we just have to let it pass.  I have now gone back to my daily-can-of-Coke habit because "it makes me feel better."  I also have been neglecting my cooking duties.

Yesterday hubby complained that we had no snacks in the house (right after we had groceries delivered).  So I decided to be a nice wife and make some oatmeal raisin cookies.  Unfortunately we were out of raisins so I had run out to get them.  I was told to also pick up some other snacks.  Here is where I fell completely off the wagon.  I was hungry, sick and tired and going to the store for "snacks."  Instead of telling me what he wanted, hubby sent me to the store without a list to "look around and find snacks."  I came home with Coke, Cheezits, cookies (yes, even though I only needed to add raisins to my already prepared dough), etc.  What a complete waste of money for food that I really don't need to be eating.  We had a ton of cheese, fruit and veggies in the fridge, but instead opted for unhealthy processed junk.  So this week I need to focus on getting back on track, getting rid of some of the junk and really eating good food.  Wish me luck!

happy new year!

Happy New Year!  We spent New Year's Eve at home with our lovely little kiddos.  The day was spent with a lot of playing, a little cleaning and some yummy snacks for dinner.  We had cocktail meatballs, chicken enchilada dip with tortilla chips, and cheese fondue with bread cubes.  I loved all of the food I made, but Hubby and Princess were a little pickier.  Oh well...that seems to be the case with most things in the house.

2009 was a wonderful year for us!  We celebrated our 8th year of marriage, our 3rd year with our amazing big girl and welcomed our second little girl into the world.  Princess has grown so much over the last year.  She is potty-trained, going to preschool and learning to use a computer.  She loves to dance and sing and is oh so dramatic.  Mouse's 3rd tooth broke through on New Year's Eve, she's started taking 2-3 steps consistently this past week and is now starting table food.  She loves meats and cheeses!  We feel so fortunate to have spent the last year with our sweet little girls and so much love in our hearts!  Thank you to all of our friends and family that helped to make 2009 such a special year!

Usually I avoid New Year's resolutions, but I thought I'd give it a go this year.  While 2009 was a great year for us, my goals for 2010 are to do everything a little better - play more, get organized, eat better, workout - all those little things that are so tempting to put off till tomorrow. 

Play More:  I want to get the girls enrolled in a parent/child class like swim lessons or gymnastics.  Also, we got movie tickets galore for Christmas (so excited!).  Hopefully I can bring myself to take advantage of some free babysitting and use the tickets...I have some separation issues.  We've taken Princess to the movies a couple of times and she loves it, so I'm looking forward to doing some more of that too!  I'll also have to plan a few more date nights in 2010.  I think we had one or two in 2009...my fault, again, because of being away from the girls.  Poor hubby! 

Get Organized:  I really need to get the house in order...it's driving my crazy!  We have SO much stuff!  I've started organizing and packing up the girls' baby clothes that no longer fit.  Very sad for me...I can't believe how quickly they've grown!!!  I also have several baby items to get rid of:  bottle sterilizer, bottle warmer, etc.  Mostly stuff the girls have outgrown.  Again, I hate to get rid of it because it means my girls are growing up, but we need the space!  I also need to set up a calendar and LOOK at it daily.  I feel so flighty these days and can hardly remember what I have going on each week.  It makes life much more stressful than it needs to be.

Eat Better:  I have a very lofty goal of reducing the amount we eat out to once a week.  Currently, the girls and I eat lunch out about once a week (not including weekends) and hubby eats lunch out every day.  Then we'll eat dinner out 2-3 times a week.  I'm really going to have to work hard to meet this goal, but it's a much needed improvement.  I also want to include more fruits and veggies in our meals.  It's amazing to me how much cheaper it is to eat unhealthy fast food than to buy healthy food at the grocery store.  I've been doing quite a bit of research on buying foods locally and am thinking of joining a CSA this summer and purchasing meats from some local farmers.  Unfortunately the weather here isn't conducive to farming in the winter, so I'll have to wait for spring!

Workout:  Prior to the holidays I was attempting to go mall walking with the girls twice a week.  It was very difficult during the holidays because I had errands to run or things to do at home.  Now that the busy time has passed, I plan to resume my twice-a-week mall walking.  Hopefully I can convince a few friends to join me so that I don't spend a ton of money while I'm there.  It's so tempting to stop and shop or grab food!  I thought about joining a gym, but it's so expensive and I'm not really comfortable putting my kiddos in childcare while I'm working out.  Plus I think it sets a good example for them if they're witnessing my workouts.  Hopefully I can make a dent in the remaining 15 lbs of pregnancy weight I still have to lose!

What goals do you have for 2010?  Best of luck in reaching your goals and I hope you have a happy and healthy 2010!

bento boxes

Apparently there is a whole bento craze and I'm just now catching on.  I decided to look up lunch ideas for Princess and me because I'm getting tired of the same old stuff.  Plus after spending a fortune eating out over the weekend, since our cupboards were bare, I decided we need to be eating at home as much as possible.  On top of that, it's healthier (and maybe it will help a little more of this baby weight to disappear).  So I googled "lunch ideas for a 3-year old" and came across some sights about bentos. 

A little background for those of you who are also new to this:  Bento is the Japanese word for a meal served in a box.  The traditional bento consists of 4 parts rice or other carb, 2 parts protein, and 1 part other ingredients such as vegetables.  You can really pack it to meet any dietary need.  One thing I found interesting is that if you pack a tight Japanese-style bento, the calories of the meal will be about the number of millileters that the bento box holds.  I then did a search for bento boxes and there are a ton of sites!  Okay, so it's basically packing a lunch box, but the ideas I've found are so creative and different then the school lunches I used to take. 

 

TomoTomo Collection from Ichicban Kan website

The first site I found was bentolunch.  The author of the blog has 2 kiddos and posts pictures of their daily lunches.  The lunches are really cute and this is what started me on the search for other bento sites.  Another site - justbento - has a ton of bento information on it...recipes, how to pack a bento, how to choose a bento box, freezing food, etc.  That site has pretty much anything you want to know about bento boxes.  I'm really excited to get started.  I've decided to hold off on purchasing bento boxes until I know I'll follow through with it.  Instead I picked up some plastic storage containers at Target and figure I'll try that for a while.  If it doesn't work out, well, you can always use plastic containers!  I have to admit that after looking at some of the bento boxes and the creative things some of these people do with their food, it's taking a lot of restraint on my part not to go crazy purchasing stuff! 

I've already started on freezing some foods.  After watching Jon and Kate Plus 8 (with Emeril Lagasse) the other night, I decided to try out the chili mac recipe he made.  I used ground turkey, instead of ground beef, like Emeril did on the show.  I also added a cup of chopped mushrooms (so the family wouldn't notice them) and a cup of frozen peas.  Chopping onions is the worst, so I always use frozen chopped onions to save on time (and tears).  The recipe turned out really good, but I think next time I'll use a little less oregano. 

I also made my own chicken nuggets (although the fam loved it so much there wasn't a ton left to freeze).  I cut chicken breasts into pieces, dipped them in egg, and then rolled them in bread crumbs.  Bake at 375 until done and voila - tasty and easy!  In addition, I boiled some chicken breasts (to freeze as shredded chicken) and eggs together as suggested on lunchinabox.  Finally I made some mini chocolate chip cookies.  Unfortunately those were gobbled up too quickly to freeze.  But here's a picture...I think they turned out pretty well and are pretty cute!

It's been a busy cooking week for me and hopefully I'll continue to feel motivated and inspired in that department!  Here are some other blogs about bentos I've found that I really enjoy reading: 
*Lunch in a Box - another fantastic site with information on bentos with recipes, how to's, etc.
*Adventures of a Flake - information on Muffin Tin Mondays and other preschooler activites
*Preschool Playbook - also participates in Muffin Tin Mondays and includes preschool activities (I'm really enjoying the posts on learning centers).
*Her Cup Overfloweth - creator of Muffin Tin Mondays

I hope you enjoy checking out those sites too and I plan on getting started on our packed lunches after returning from next week's vacation!  Oh, if you want to know where to buy bento supplies, I liked these two sites best - Daiso Japan and Ichiban Kan.

mouse update

We have caught a total of 3 mice...the little one Daddy let go in the farm field and then we've caught two in traps.  Those happened in the first two days we had the traps set up.  Luckily, we haven't seen any others.  I'm tired of cleaning up mouse poo.  I get to clean up enough poo throughout the day between two diaper-wearing kiddos and a puppy, so I'm happy to get a break from the mouse poo.  Hopefully we won't be seeing any more around here.  I'm planning to purchase some peppermint or spearmint plants and some peppermint oil this weekend.  I've read that the smell helps deter mice.  So if it works, we won't have to deal with mousetraps anymore.  Wouldn't that be great (not to mention so much more humane!).  Has anyone else tried this method? 

toddler chats

Princess and I have the best conversations at bedtime.  I suppose it's because I'm always interested in hearing what she has to say and she's trying to prolong the inevitable.  Still, I find her so fascinating and can't help but play along!  Tonight we somehow got on the subject of Mouse's Baptism.  I told her that we were going to have a big party.  That we would go to church and the priest would dump holy water on Mouse's head and bless her, just like we did when she was a little baby.  Her response was "they dumped howy wata on my head and I was cwying."  Followed by "we not going to bwess anybody."

Next the party, which Princess is very excited about.  We discussed the food we would be having...ham, potato salad, cake.  Princess rubs her tummy, licks her lips and says "Mmmmm...I wuv cake."  When asked what else we should have for the party, she told me that we needed candles.  Not just any candles, she wants a green one.

Then I told her that Grandma and Grandpa will be coming along with Auntie Sarah and Uncle Josh, Uncle Andy and Auntie Valerie, and then Nana and Pa, Auntie Robyn and Uncle Darin, Isabel and Olivia, the Brinks and Mr. Reed.  "That's wots of people.  Uncle Josh wuvs me... and I wuv Uncle Josh.  I wuv Josh and Sarah...and Uncle Andy and Bawrie and I wuv Gwamma and Gwampa.  We have wots of fwiends."  She is very much looking forward to having everyone sleepover at our house.  As we discussed this party, her eyes grew bigger and bigger.  By the time we were finished, she was so excited she was bouncing around the bed.  It's really great how much she remembers all of the family and loves to see everyone.  I'm sure we will have many more discussions on this topic before the Baptism takes place.